i'm so hungover...i might vomit in a handbag instead of selling them
It's been a long time since I felt this bad on a Monday... and for that, I thank you.
What color are my eyes?
Ummmm... 34 C?
he's just a really huge penis that sells weed
Hey so I just want to get straight to the point it was me who ate the last cupcake and it was your sister who I fucked last nigt
I just quit my job so I could get dick this weekend. I'm pretty sure my need for dick is much more important than the customers' needs.
You made me take a photo of you under the stairs at the bar. "Look I'm Harry Potter."
Just had to double check that I had pants on. THAT kind of weekend.
Our prom king just sent me a dick pic. I know it's 10 years later but I feel like I've finally made it.
Let's drink tonight I promise I'll make it out of the house
But what we lack in money, we make up for in dry humor and drugs
Yeah I'm just gonna stay here and spread my horniness to the world.
I have a whole new respect for her. She chugged half a bottle of jack daniels, and then peed all over his wall. Serves him right.
so i went to the bathroom and my thong was on sideways... i guess that solves the mystery
Dude, I'm pretty sure I just drank iced tea last night and yet I'm still hungover. What the fuck is my body anymore ?
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