omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
The hot Japanese girl in my class just said her "favorite sexy American actor is Nick Cage." That, I can work with.
He wants a "vagina fling" before he commits to dick for life. I'm gonna allow it.
I gave the naked guy in the hotel a pop tart. He stopped crying.
im actually so stoned and hungover i feel like a bag of jello stuffed into a human shape
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
If there was a bread and water delivery truck id make sweet hungover love with it.
Just had a VERY VIVID visualization of wrapping a pizza around my cock and fucking its brains out. Soooooo less weed more dates?
went out last night. woke up with a lisp.
i was so unappreciative the bar was giving out sweatbands UNTIL I casually used it during sex.
You either got a dog, or you have a boy over. I can't tell from the noises which it is.
No problem...what are friends for if they can't rub eachothers genitals.
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
I just woke up, dressed as Chris Brown, with a bunless hot dog (presumably from 7/11) in my pocket, wearing a pair of shoes I don't recognize as my own. Help.
The sex was so good we high-fived after.
Randomize
