Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
i'm trying to reconcile what i did last night with who i am as a person.
how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
then she made me sanitize my hands before fingering her...i may have found my soulmate
A disheveled girl in front of me just looked down, shrieked, and yelled to the girl next to her "what is this" while pointing at two large white stains near the crotch of her black jeans. I love that Thursdays are weekends, it makes awesome Friday mornings
we put the last xanax in the middle and played hungry hungry hippos to see whod get it
fair is fair
Just think of all the blizzard sex people are having right now
Damn you and your Monday night power hours.
I JUST MET THE GIANT MAN THAT WILL CARRY ME FROM PLACE TO PLACE
I think I was using my hair to catch my vomit last night.
You were.
I got head this morning from the 31-year-old version of Jenn. It was like a blow job from the future while a simultaneous blast from the past for 10 minutes.
You were doing bacon vodka shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce. You're officially fucking disgusting. I love you.
Spent 38 bucks on dollar wells last night. I'm pretty sure my liver is staging a mutiny right now.
yeah true but how easily can you rip a scrotum
He wouldn’t know a good thing if it bit him on the ass. Which, btw, I did.
Randomize
