12 pack with dinner. Living by yourself is awesome.
So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
His response today determines what state my vagina will be in this weekend.
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
My Yoga instructor is playing the music from 'Requiem for a Dream' it makes me very reluctant to put my ass in the air
It feels like you stuck your dick in a fire and then branded the inside of me.
I'm gonna try Jim's breakup remedy this weekend.
Is that the one where you drink 3 cases of beer and rewatch as much WWE RAW as you can find? Or the one where you hookup with fatties on Craigslist?
How about we just have a naked taco night instead?
my mom snuck into my room, washed her clothes and made her breakfast. what the fuck she's a better boyfriend than I am
Whoever put the life size cut out of Snoop Dog next to me in bed understands me.
I mean, we were all drinking, but I'm pretty sure kidnapping came up.
I woke up with masking tape on my nipples this morning........... WHY DO BAD THINGS HAPPEN TO GOOD PEOPLE
It's a shame things ended how they did. We were well on our way to transforming from acquaintances with benefits to friends with benefits.
I'm a peeled potato compared to her. I'm a peeled potato compared to anyone. I'm a peeled potato.
Are you high?
Randomize
