shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
Fuck it dude, we gotta bounce before she starts talking about her steve irwin conspiracy
Let's turn this shoulder dislocation into a positive. Come to the hospital, bring some beers, let's party.
We literaly had to peel your fingers off the jose cuervo bottle and lock it in someones room
Think they will judge us if our pre drink is a kiddie pool of jello shots?
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
I was going to ask the people in the kitchen to keep the volume down, but they're cooking pasta at 3 AM and one complimented me on my polka-dot nightgown. They're high. No volume control.
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
Planning a foam party. Swimsuits are mandatory, and please no granny suits. If you wear a granny suit I will stick you in the corner and put a cone hat on your head.
I'm ready to get married, then we can lie around watching anime and eating pizza while he rubs baby oil on me
after attempting to eat a candy cane bigger than my hand i have determined there's no way to eat this that doesn't seem erotic
It just so happens all of their names are Ryan, so I never have to change whose name I moan.
I don't know where you went, but if you're anywhere near the liquor, pour me another drink
He just kept repeating "It was like meep meep meep on my balls."
Randomize
