I cant take that shot because i want my penis to stay hard.
Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
Im sure that doesnt mean its ruined... It was your bithday you get a free "im drunk at 7 am" card
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
Hey man thanks for carrying me in and out of that frat house. There's no I in team.
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
Just told my mom sparks is a health drink. Officially getting hammered on the way to the beach.
I'm currently trying to decide if crown or wild turkey will hurt worse coming back out through my nose later.
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
My glasses were in the garbage this morning
You kicked my dad IN THE NUTS right when he walked in.
Sorry, man. Thought he was a cop.
2017 is gonna be explosive... Already watching fireworks out the window while shit my brains out. Happy Ew Year
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
Walking actually physically hurts. We should do it again some time.
Dude I'm fucking tired of freshman, there are god damn teeth marks on my dick again
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