Def slept AT the bar last night, wow that's a first!
i think i may have caused an international incident at the french embassy, just fyi
hahaha how?
its a long story involving a horse trailer and some shrubbery
Oh my god. I just envisioned myself eating panda meat. I need to get out of this class.
Stars make me really horny. Especially that shiny one its just staring at me.
I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
He pocket texted me while I was blowing him in the car...What are the odds?
Considering how often you blow him,high.
This is a great bar, except you can't even randomly burst into song without them assuming you're drunk and cutting you off.
Reading an example in the GRE study book referencing Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles while wearing TMNT pajamas. *airfist*
omg please tell me you're eating pizza right now too.
She got called into work early but she left me a note that had directions to her roommates stash of weed on top of a two bacon and egg mcmuffins. I think I win.
I tell you, MacGyver never had to put up with people shitting themselves while he worked...
He wins the giant teddy bear for getting the neuva ring on the dick
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
I just realized how terrible that was... I was drumming on your penis to a song about Baby Jesus.
he just got here with a handle of tequila and box of condoms. looks like i'll be spending the weekend in bed
Omg, new summer goal: sex in a bouncy castle.
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