why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
yeh she's definitely getting a ham and plan b omelette in the morning
I feel like hell. The amount of black beans I found in my hair tells me I hit rock bottom
looking back it was a good thing we were too wasted to fire up the chainsaw
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
Was this before or after he told that homeless man outside the bar about his past sexual experiences?
Waking up with a sore back because you put the team on it for jager pong all night
I made $80 at the club last night by telling him he was like a wild pony and I just wanted to tame him
Found an old burrito under my bed
You are a sick fuck
Listen I'm a sentimental character under all this alcohol and ratchetry
Just found out that his ringtone for me is a train blowing bc and I quote 'I know when you call I'm getting laid'
I had forgotten what new underwear feels like. It's as if angels descended from heaven for the sole purpose of supporting my junk.
Babe, holding my hair while i blow you doesn't count as being romantic
So nothing to worry about, but i'm probly going to jail soon, just thought i should let you know so you didn't worry. Bye!
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