I miss Bob Barker.
Yeah, more like Douche Carey...
some girl had on jean underwear. i hate america.
if i died would you start the facebook group?
just read twilight to her over the phone, while in the bathtub, candlelight...i'd love to say no homo but that was so gay.
so many types of cookies right now. i'm eating four kinds of cookies that i've made into larger cookie sandwiches. too high. whoa.
You never go ass to mouth. That's quite possibly the most important rule Paramedic school has taught me.
im sleeping in a hamic at a mansion. best hangover ever
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
We just started the day with vitamin bombs. Daily vitamin + whatever's left in your glass from last night = feel like a champion
I just can't deal with that sentence
I feel a little uneasy about having my grandma sleep in my bed that I've banged chicks in not too long ago... Fuckin blizzards
AND I woke up to eggs in my bra. Thanks Taco Cabana...
I had to say goodbye to one of my fuck buddies last night. He's voting for Trump, we shouldn't be doing it anyways.
We'd like to invite you to our threesome! Lingerie is encouraged and drinks will be provided. Next Friday, roommate night, my bedroom. Hope to see you there!
When i said you could use my car and have sex in the back....i wasn't being serious.
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
Randomize
