Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
He looked me in the chest and said "I think I was visited by the titty fairy last night"
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
She started licking your face, then you turned to me and said "I guess thats my cue", and you proceeded to hook up with her.
Soooo how am i supposed to explain to my mom that i was admitted to the hospital but you kidnapped me within 20 minutes?
When he left he said something to the effect of "well now that I've been used..." I think he may be on to me.
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
I had a dream last night that I used a condom when I had sex. That's how I knew it was a dream
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
I need you to ship me a penis cookie care package.
Drake has all the answers
Some guy I'd never met and didn't invite threw the punch bowl at the wall and set the plastic skeleton on fire. I don't think we'll be getting the full deposit back
was that the third sophomore you've banged this week?
third one in three days
Your heart isn't making stupid decisions... your penis is outsmarting your brain. Stop fucking her!
Also: I hate her so much. She's out at hooters, making spelling errors, while I'm literally sitting at a clinic getting std tested. Which of us won the morality award in this break up.
Randomize
