His moose knuckle keeps winkin at me
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
I woke up in a house cuddled up with a beagle on a futon. have no idea who anyone is but they all call me stretch. yeaaahhh boiiiiii
the last girl i hooked up with and the last guy i hooked up with are hooking up right now. this is where bisexuality becomes a problem.
No you can't have a vodka redbull. The pilgrims didn't have vodka redbull.
she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise.
With any luck I will spend the duration of this flight with my tray table up my seatbelt securely fastened and my face in his lap
How is it that you get into at least one taco related fight a year?
We could be hammered at a childrens film. You failed me
A nice make out session never hurt anyone. Plus he's a pilot, so he'll know the safety procedures for when the night crashes and burns.
Dude. Went to buy some jack and sailor Jerry, when the guy at the counter realized it was my birthday everybody in the store including the stoners and the elderly sang to me. Then they gave me shots of moonshine. 21st bday was a success
The only word that describes how much hair I shaved off of my ass is "considerable".
Can I put tequila in the fish bowl? I think he wants to party too
NO BABIES. YOUR VAGINA WILL BLEED WITHIN A FORTNIGHT.
Randomize
