I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
I'm a simple man, with a social life most psychopaths would cringe at
believe me... letting the man that delivered you from your mother's vagina do shots off your stomach is really fucking awkward.
there was a 40 knocked over. chips and salsa all over the floor. and she was in her thong doing boot camp on demand in the middle of the room..
I'm not sure which is worse. The fact that I slept with him last night, or the fact that you did too.
Packing up everything in the dorm. Silly bands to unused condom ratio is ridiculous.
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
Not enough. Tell the person next to you to give you their drink. I give you permission. And then chug it. Be a hero tonight.
Dude, fuck the siberian warm up. You can't put vodka in hot chocolate. Learn from my mistakes
The money is just too good to quit doing it. I'm using the same justification strippers use.
Woke up w/ the same freshman as last Saturday but we were sober this time. Is that a relationship?
She has either a C-Section scar or a bullet wound, I can't quite tell
bad news.. campus security walked me home last night and when i tried to tell them where i lived they assured me they knew where our house was.
It was weird, because he kept shaking his head like he was motorboating me...but on my vagina.
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
Randomize
