I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
you might get a letter about the baby you put in me. i was mad when i sent it.
The cops found weed in michael jacksons house today...it makes up for the child molesting, I like him more now.
Knee deep in strippers, everything is comped. will try hard to be there at 8. i promise.
I am sitting on my kitchen floor drunk with a bottle of jose cuervo, tryin to make cinnamon rolls and write a paper. I love college
after the cops left he pulled the weed out of his ass and we smoked it
He just asked if I would make his black snake moan. Dating basketball players is not worth the glory
please stop yelling "ITS NARNIAAAAAAAAA" out of our window at the lone person walking home in the snow
Nothing like puking into an empty cooler at a red light on the way to get plan b.
I'm not sure. But a mason jar of drug free urine just as soon as anyone can would be so awesome.
It was all fun and games until he noticed the hickey that he hadn't given me...
I sense lesbianism
That's a weird power
He had a small dick anyway. I'm glad I barfed on it.
Just got up.... With the club stamp on my ass.... How did it got there????
My dad accidentally texted me asking if I had weed...
Maybe you should say yes, and you guys can like bond or something...
Randomize
