only if we run a train.
done.
I am trying to think of a way to make alcohol cupcakes
Nope, just sitting on the couch, eating an advent calendar, being depressed about the herps.
I just stole a conducting baton from the chicago symphony orchestra... i have to stop drinking on weeknights
I'll be really easy to find... I'm the naked one rolling around in cats.
how many dildos make it a "collection?"
He leaned off the deck, puked a waterfall of beer, looked back at everyone and said "it was just a burp".
But mostly the blowjob in the airport bathroom was what I was laughing at.
I had a 10 minute conversation with the refrigerator, it was telling me how it likes to be opened and closed. Ecstasy, I love you.
Dilemas of the modern woman: deciding whether or not to write on your ex's wall for his birthday. This is serious.
I know I come to this conclusion on a fairly regular basis but I really do need a babysitter
I have never paid for drugs and I'm sure not going to start today especially on a holiday
And now to play every stoner's favorite game: Where the Fuck Did We Park the Car?! Disneyland Edition!
IT'S A GIANT FUCKING ROBOT, DUDE. LOGIC IS OUT OF THE QUESTION BECAUSE AWESOME.
I've realized that my life is a cycle of high that is only broken by sobering up at work, which only happens because I can't smoke more
Randomize
