Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
omg a stripper jus od'd on stage.
i think this is the gayest thing you've ever shown me. and i'm pretty sure you've sent me pictures of a dude sticking his dick in a horse's nose.
Bonus points if the penis has a little hat too
Is tonight a drink a little and reminisce kinda night, or a drink everything and pray kinda night?
now that I know that you did coke with your mom I can't look at her the same
I deserve a fucking award for best roommate. I just cleaned his room, so he can have a 3 some
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Wesley from the Princess Bride. I kept telling him what I wanted him to do and all he would say was "as you wish"
It's not really the holidays until I raid the medicine cabinet. Happy hydrocodone to me
And a merry methadone to all
Two drag queens are fighting over me. And yet the night is still getting weirder
This was the first time I've ever pushed myself until I vomited. Sorry, random couple laying on a dock at 8:30am. I would have picked a better spot so you didn't have to watch/listen to me vomit, but you guys were being MAD quiet. I had no idea you were there.
I can't sleep. Send Llama pictures.
One less thong to worry about.
One less *thing! But probably that too.
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
My bald co-worker just chugged a literal gallon of coffee. My condolences to his kidneys.
Randomize
