girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
You can't date a girl from every country.
I'm the captain planet of women
Before we started fucking, he laid me on the bed, and asked my what my sleep number was, so that i would be "comfy"
My neighbor is on the his front porch in a robe dipping a popsicle into what appears to be vodka. I want to be his son.
Okay the common myth about putting tampons in you nostrils for a nose bleed is busted. It just starts coming out through your throat.
I forgot that I thought it would be a good idea to hairspray my toilet seat last night after I took 12 shots of vodka so when I just went to pee, I stuck to the toilet. Never drinking again.
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
Would you judge me if I made John grow a bush while he is in Cancun so he doesn't cheat on me?
Day drinking! Today! (tomorrow too!) Our place! Whenever you get off work! Ready go!
Summers almost over and we haven't golfed, got naked or had sex yet. Let's do all three in one day, no particular order.
How is it medically possible for my urine to smell like espresso
So i stood up out of the sunroof while he gave me oral. Car was still moving. Exactly how illegal is that?
That's pretty intense. There aren't many people I would pick over a burrito
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
After he finished, he fell on the floor and whispered "finally satisfied"
Randomize