My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.
The stories of what you did in Cuba got home before you.
Why is it only times like these when I'm scrubbing the cum stains off my futon before my family gets here that I seriously begin to question my life choices?
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
I feel like after that many guys, all of the water in your body is just replaced with pure jizz, honestly.
Just slept with a female bodybuilder. not cute. but it was like fucking hulk hogan with a twat. Beastly.
im so disgusted with myself. funny thing was i lasted 15 seconds. she benches 325
Exactly. This is the bit where I learn a heartwarming lesson about not making my drinks half vodka
Bro... You handed me an ice cube from your drink and said "tell me if it tastes like pickles".
You coulda licked the floor this morning and got drunk.
Oh please not the Easy Cheese again. That was weird.
His flight is delayed. Mother Nature is delaying me from sex.
dude there's a blind guy on the trail using his service dog to hit on girls.
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
I feel like it is our duty to make homophobic people more afraid of us. They're never going to change, but maybe we can get to a "wrath of god" kind of worship-him-or-he'll-destroy-you-with-his-care-bear-stare type thing.
Randomize
