Jennifer and I just ate like 4 jello shots w/ a guy dressed as inspector gadget. We are still in the capital building btw
I love Texas.
Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
Is moral bankruptcy something you need to file for?
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
She wouldn't put out on the first date. I think my boner put a hole in my mattress.
Let's get drunk and go to Walmart and just tackle people at random.
I should start wearing my Batman shirt more often when I drink. Good things happen. All sorts of shit.
That super awesome moment when the guy who threw up in your bed last night crawls into your roommate's bed the next morning...Naked...She was in it.
You kept hiding under tables and grabbing people's legs and shouting SHARK ATTACK.
You told me you were trying to learn all the MLB ballparks while you waited for your porn to load.
How my distance relationship is going: he's trying to sext me & I'm stuffing pizza in my face.
Turns out naked twister is less fun than it sounds. I can never look Lee in the eye again. But Aimee's boobs are glorious.
How was it?
Incredible. Everyone in the world should be having the kind of sex I've been having.
He should write a pamphlet or something...
Forget Covid themed costumes. I need one that attracts a quality penis
preferably one with a six figure job and a boat
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