Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
I've spent 9 hours vomitting in the fetal position... how did i stay like this for 9 months?
What time do you think the pilgrims started drinking? I want to be as accurate as possible.
just saw a girl who had one of those monogrammed backpacks... her initials are VAG. is this a sign?
Thru out the entire phone conversation I went from thinking: he's making a gay come-on, to he's trying to sell me drugs, before realizing he was offering me a job with an internet company. Things are gonna be awkward in class this week.
Coming home soaking wet at three am and trying to convince the front desk man that we came from the library might have worked if I wasn't also roaring at everything.
you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
That dude you fucked three years ago just won Jeopardy
also karaoke with swedish 7yr old and drunk 50yr old = best idea ever
My head is just one big fuzz right now.. Its like someone replaced my brain with a teddy bear
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
I just found out two girls I dated met each other, bonded over how much they hate me, started dating and are gonna get married soon.
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
My life hurts
I woke up 30 minutes away from the bar, my car was at a train station, and when I got home all I got was the speechless head shake
Woke up this morning with girl, I ask her for some gum. She says "there's a guest toothbrush for the boys in my bathroom". I can't decide whats worse, that she has a shack brush or that I actually used it
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