I have a client coming in and there's a note that says she wants her hair to like Elisabeth Hasselback's from the view
that's Oklahoma for you
handjob tips. give me some.
I have discovered something important. The trick to making food taste better is not always 'more hot sauce'.
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
She fucked me because she said I looked like Neil Patrick Harris
Sorry for scaring your son with my drunken animal impressions
I can't believe that 100lb chick tackled me through a flight of stairs
Dear slutty diary: I lied about feeling guilty of being a homewrecker in order to have more sex. it worked.
I gave him a bunch of ideas to use to spice up their sex life. Say what you will, I am the best 'other' woman ever!
When you left the bar, you did two cartwheels and a heel click and RAN ALL THE WAY HOME.
I seriously doubt I'm gonna be able to properly put your dick in my mouth whilst upside down, but I'm willing to give it my best shot
She tried to sing jingle balls while blowing me
He forehead kissed me AND THEN asked what I was thinking. I'm taking away his man card.
Hold on gotta plunge the sink
Is that a euphemism for sex? Either way, have a good time
i got a dick pic last night and the mother fucker had a Jesus picture in the background.
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