carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
it's not our fault the pink and the sink are so close together.
"must pass the hog line" should not only be used in curling. but also when we go out to pick up girls.
When he came he sounded like a flock of birds hitting puberty
he urdandictionary'ed 'tease' on his phone and made me read through all the definitions. Am i really that bad?
You slept in the bed with him... with your top off.... and just made out with him....
just joined the mile high club. if this plane crashes because of this text, it was worth.
yolo... Doesn't that stand for 'shut the fuck up'?
my mom found me passed out in the kitchen floor with the Brita pitcher.. Happy Mothers Day
The cab driver was nice enough to let you finish your beer in the car, but you crossed the line when you started to pee in the empty bottle
Dude I woke up and he was pissing in the corner on his clothes... I called his name an he replied " I got this" and continued.
Why am I sticky / covered in baby Tylonel?
I'm far too poor to be letting my hookups wear my shirts home. I'm down to about a total of 8 shirts and have no intention of buying more
Im riding the bus with beer in one hand and chapagne in the other. I love weddings.
Too high to wash a dish but just high enough for a kitchen fire
Randomize
