I hate it when you make eye contact with someone bcs you are about to make fun of them and they take it as a hint to come hit on you.
Ah, I knew it wouldn't be long before my boobs were introduced into the conversation.
I am planning my day around naps and lesbians.
So burnt out. Like weed hangover. And someone just fell through the ceiling outside of my class. How's your morning going?
I haven't seen her in ages, how is she?
Well I woke up next to her this morning so I guess I would say she could be doing better
Also when i was high i would close my eyes and see a puppy on a grill having pancake batter poured on it.... And for whatever reason it was fucking hilarious.
I feel violated by Miley Cirrus's performance in the VMA's.
Your boyfriends underwear are hanging from my kitchen window. Where the fuck are you?!
I love this text stream: discussing the development of a business model centered around cooking acid to bankroll a yacht trip in Croatia
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
Remember when we used to smoke out of an apple at the playground? Those were some precious moments
I had sex in the tube at that same playground once. That park is full of memories.
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
So I said "fuck it" and made myself a sandwich
Being single again makes you realize how guys can go from licking your asshole one night to never texting you again
All of a sudden he got that look on his face and ran to the dance floor and started fist pumping to Rihanna that kind of night
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