should i be impressed or disgusted that i was spitting glow-in-the-dark?
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
This chic sharing the cab with me just started givin me head. I'll be an extra 5 minutes.
Ultimate Fighter Idea. You and I both have unprotected sex with the same girl in the spam of days. Whoever the child belongs to, wins and that child is the ultimate ultimate fighter.
How high are you?
I'm taking a leave of absence and sending myself to fat camp. I'll let you know when I'm out.
I'm basically flying you out for a long weekend of sex and going to the zoo
I'm cool with that
Had to snap chat three different people to ask who left the bite mark on my thigh. All three said "Wasn't me". Now I can't wear a bathing suit to my mom's pool.
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
My intervention, when it happens, should have vanilla cake....buttermilk icing.
I shit like a lady though so that rarely happens
Hey how're your balls?
Don't ever let me helicopter again.
Dude, I need a fuckin wingman and this could finally make us eskimo brothers, how can you pass that up?
He’s disease free and drives a Porsche. What else does a girl need?
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
Randomize
