p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
he just asked me if he could show me what he wanted to do to me using his action figures. where do i find these freaks?
my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
I want you to come here and listen to her climax and then tell me how funny you think it is.
just so you're aware of it in the morning: you tried to slide down the railing on a snuggie. twice.
Printed off fake 'Producer' Sundance badges for us. Pretty sure they double as free passes for getting laid by 'actresses'. Testing this theory tonight.
my favorite homeless guy just told me I drive like Batman, achievement unlocked
Mehhh. I just tried to type 'extremely', and it auto corrected to 'creek rot'. IT KNOWS WHAT I LOOK LIKE
This gem of a conversation has been brought to you be weed
Dude, you were tagged in a stripper FB selfie. That is a whole new level of something.....
Your skill with memes is vaguely frightening
we're so committed to being not committed
Don't come up here. Strippers r crying.
I love you even if you are fucked up. If you fall, i'll just get on top of you.
Were we still high when we decided to break your leg?
Randomize
