ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
I'm going to rape someone's good day.
I fell asleep with crest white strips on and ate one...
My mother just asked me if i ever swallow the goods...should i be concerned?
I can do anything tonight that doesnt involve an erection.
There's a wake for a coworker on 420 during te time of 420... Hoping everyone will be too sad to notice how high I am.
I'm blaming hurricane Irene if I get pregnant tonight.
Just walk straight and zig zag through cars tell you get to the road. That's where I am. Perpendicular to the doors do not make any turns
What are you doing? Because if it happens to be drinking, or even any activity that rhymes with "drinking", I'll be over in 5.
There are two women in my bed. I'm gonna have a bowl of noodles so I can better understand my success.
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
don't let your emotions get tangled in that sexy beard of his.
I am mentally ready for anal.
The only words we could get out of him as he stared catatonically into space were "Everyone I know and love is dead"
she was sitting on the toilet asking for me to take a "cute facebook profile picture" for her
Randomize
