I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
Brought a cooler and a case to a parade. I'm getting dirty looks since it's 10:30. Telling people it's for the troops.
We had unprotected sex and she's eating life cereal for breakfast. The universe is telling me get the plan b for her
I definitely didn't wake up this morning thinking "i wanna get gang banged today"
You threw a bunch of trashcans into the middle of the street and nothing happened. I fell on one car and suddenly there were cops everywhere...
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
I look like i have multiple stab wounds in my foot and there are footprints from the elevator to my room. What happened?
Well after the shots I danced with a homeless guy, split my toe on broken glass, and had a 20 piece mcnugget. Who says postgrad life is boring.
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
Welcome to the club of "Sick of cleaning up actual shit." We meet on the 3rd Sunday of each month. Bring your ceremonial viking helmet.
you never un-have a 4some
Oh shit that's not good dude. I'd head straight for Williamsport hospital the first ingredient in that shit is lithium batteries. You don't want to know what the second one is
While walking to class I was handed a red bull, condoms, and a mini bible. I love my school.
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