so, totally just picked up a pack of red bull, and some magnum condoms and the old woman at the register's tone went from "hi blah how are you" to "oh....how YOU DOIN'?" she knew what was up
Why did u sent me a picture of a dead horse?
i could hear you having sex and was jealous, wanted to kill the mood
Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video
good thing vaginas are great cup holders
When we woke up, I asked if we could play "what does your name rhyme with".....he said 'bave' thank god it was easy
now that we've slept with the entire soccer team i think its time to expand the horizon.
The fact that you think you peed off a roof shows you shouldn't have been on a roof.
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
i'm on the subway and being revisted by the ghosts of tequilas past.
She's cheated on every boyfriend she's ever had with the same guy. She's like a slutty yo-yo.
You fell out of your barstool, I tried to help you but you said if I got any closer I'd be drinking my meals through a straw, So there you sat.
We got back from the bar and started watching bizzare foods, which subsequently led to the consumption of large amounts of rancid lunch meat and small insects.
I currently look like a drunken mermaid, god I love beach parties.
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
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