There's a show on bravo about fat people dancing. FAT PEOPLE. DANCING.
This is god's gift to the unemployed.
to be honest..when i was little i used to think sharks can swim out of drains and eat people
it was all downhill after the free blackjack taco
You were pretty fucked up... decided playing hopscotch down the stairs was an excellent idea.. it was extremely entertaining
What are the odds of finding the one hot Australian dude with erecile dysfunction?
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
He told everyone he was freezing their keys so they couldn't drive drunk. When I opened the freezer this morning, my keys were at the bottom of an unfrozen ice cream tub of vodka.
She just tried to snort granola up her nose but its ok she's not bleeding.
Let's enter the circle of trust. Are we there yet? Ok. If I somehow hypothetically slept with Amandas ex husband...on a scale of one to ten...how bad is that?
It's a lost cause. Soon she's gonna get naked, just let nature run its course
Does it qualify as sexting if you're both pretending to be fictional characters?
I'm not sure whether to be proud of you or weirded out.
Learn from me. Do not smoke cigs and fold laundry in your room. The cigarette will fall into the dresser without you noticing and your shirts will be on fire. Wanna go shopping tomorrow? I need some new shirts.
Costco (TM). Making alcoholism affordable!
I'm eating go-gurt and drinking beer alone in the dark. This is why you shouldn't marry young.
I'm having to shit out rocks
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