how do I set my phone to only ring when I'm asleep when sex is certain?
We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.
she said if I bought her franzia she would blow me, and she would fuck me if I splurged on martini and rossi. Franzia it is
He doesn't fuck you and he's married, why do you keep letting him cum all over your stomach?
In the hopes he'll just put it in one day?
The National Anthem was on so I had to have a beer
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
Hey remember that thing i said about never apologizing for being a hot mess? Well that was before you found me drunk in the hallway with no pants.
She is larger then a hippo. You could cut her open in the middle of a blizzard and crawl in like Luke skywalker. Throw a couch and a tv in there and you're set
Want to come over and rub aloe on my tits?
Just cleaned someone else's sperm off of my bedroom wall. Never throwing a house party again.
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
She loves introducing her friends to my foreskin.
I have bad memories with every alcohol but we manage to work through the problems for the good of the relationship
Hold me and let me compliment your butt
I'm still thinking about that amazing orgasm last night. I literally heard angels singing "Hallelujah!!"
Randomize
