Very drunk. laura says hi. i can't find my pants. i think i'm in philly, but it might be jersey somewhere
You know its bad when you're praying for a hangover just so you aren't still drunk at work anymore.
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
i hate always having to make my eye shadow look really good since my eyes always end up closed by the end of the night in pics
They won't let us do straight shots of 151 since that guy lit his face on fire.
I just made the answer to all my security questions "fuck you" with various levels of ! marks. I may regret this in the morning.
Walked up in time to hear him say "you saw I was in a relationship on facebook? So why are you holding my nuts?" To her. That's loyalty man
He took off his priest costume and proceeded to dryhump the teletubby.
I found his belly button lint in my hair. Can't say it was worth it.
This reminds me of the time I was given a lap dance by a David Bowie drag king...
this hangover isn't hhappening. im not letting it
its winning. its definitely happening
You gave him that scrunchie you made and called it your "sex offering".
I think I'm gunna glue a sign to my head that says "WAKE ME UP BEFORE 7!" And go to sleep and hope a kind passer by wakes me up for my exam .
I’m drunk and naked and looking for my charger - title of my autobiography.
theres a girl in the library eating whip cream out of a starbucks cup... only whip cream, im way to high for this shit
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