How come twittering sounds sexual?
Because of Bambi.
dude u gotta turn down the techno when u bang that chick its creepy
Is it sad that the only reason I haven't lapsed into depression is that I'm prettier than her?
Nah, we all need something.
There's people holding up abortion signs everywhere. I guess the people of Florida want you to remember you fucked up on Spring Break.
I got my parents high. They've been watching spongebob for six hours. You cannot tell me I'm not the favorite
Why did you put hummus in my pillow case?
She's legit crying about wanting more sex. Holy shit.
i think i had a heart attack, prayed, and jizzed my pants.all at once.
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
I still can't believe he turned down that threesome with us in central park. He must be really committed.
So his mom walked in the kitchen while I was sucking him off and just casually suggested that "I'd need a glass of water after that"
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
Whatever. I am not explaining the physics of my dick slapping.
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
when we woke up this morning she was missing two teeth. the front two.
Randomize
