Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
could you grab mr moo while you're at his apt?
you brought your stuffed animal to a booty call?
Literally just as i started to cum the church bells next ot my house began to ring. either it was the most epic timing ever or god was watching and congratulating me
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
If she doesnt understand your inherent need to teabag an emo chick, do you really want to be with her?
bro im too drunk for your spanish code words. did you fuck her or not.
Not complaining, but why is there a Russian chick downstairs making latkes?
These pubs in Ireland act like hand jobs aren't the universal currency
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
Look outside and see if the septic tank explodes when I flush this.
I need all the beers. I want to be holding on to the grass so I don't fall off the earth drunk.
i am no longer ashamed when i walk into the dining hall for sunday brunch and i'm greeted with applause for suriving my weekend
My moral compass kept pointing to his penis.
We’ve got a propane heater on our back porch if you want to come over and eat a McRib in peace
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