We have to go find her fucking car. She came home from a 80 dollar cab ride, no shoes, and all she remembers is its at a burger king on a street with an H in it
I need a leather bustier to keep them in.
Too kinky for 11:30am. Stop that.
they said they heard you say put it in my butt
the people going to church this morning while i was walking home did not seem as pleased as i was with how many beads i earned last night
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
i've been lying on top of my bed for the past 20 minutes
i'm about to blow half an adderall though and try to rally
Yeah you insisted everyone watch Space Jam at 2 in the morning then you cried the whole way through it. You were the very worst kind of drunk.
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
Nope if you can't be there for me emotionally, then my vagina can't be there for you physically. That's my rule.
Need to spend sober time with him while fully clothed. I can't decide if he's a seriously amazing man or a complete fucking dickbag.
This is me not judging you for what a fine line you draw between the two.
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
I'm proud of you for choosing to be an organ donor on your fake!!
There are condoms rolled onto each bunny ear of the ears I was wearing last night
Jus had a dream that I borrowed bob dylans car to save us from a pack of raptors. Pretty stoked about it.
Heard about your divorce. Let me know if I can do anything for you or your penis ;-)
Randomize
