Those balls look pretty dangerous.
giving a 30 min presentation still drunk is like giving birth, upside down in a pit of snakes while being on fire.
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
She said my main job as maid of honor is to ensure the groom doesn't find out that each of his seven groomsmen has had his penis inside her.
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
Pretty sure I just had sex with the black kid who grew up in a car from "angels in the outfield"
How come I never meet celebrities?
you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
at 6am he came into my room and kicked me in the stomach. when i finally got up he was passed out in my hallway and the bathtub water was running
She tried to leave the threesome and I heard you yell "Hey! We don't quit at halftime!"
Just wanted you to know two things, 1st I sent the second thing to a broad ive been talking too. 2nd that was not just a fart.
Before we rave about the healing powers of your penis, remember it nearly killed me as well.
I wrote "fuck you meg" on my toaster strudel with the icing. I call it "passive aggressive breakfast"
ill be home in an hour. Be in my bed ready for disappointment
Probably not. Getting pulled over and puking my guts out on the side of the road in front of the cop and him making fun of me, was not my finest moment. Plus I lost my debit card.
I'm really busy with my period
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