we're microwaving frozen margaritas its not the same without u
A kid wearing a Batman belt buckle in my psych class just asked how people get pee fetishes. I'm too high for this.
He doesn't like you, he likes u not having a gag relfex
i felt obligated to tell him happy birthday since we trashed his house and i fucked his friend in his basement
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
ugh i can't even wear this perfume anymore. it just brings back blurry memories of blowjobs and regret.
It's the only time I've ever felt manly shitting myself
i woke up and saw you were brushing his hair naked. I can never pass out around you, man.
We were talking when all of a sudden she reach and started squeezing my dick and goes "nice." and then just kept the conversation going like nothing happened.
You suck at answering, but you did manage to avoid a fun conversation about hemorrhoids. So maybe you're great at answering.
I'm not sure I can continue to condone our having sex in all of your friends' beds
Gays age differently than straights. 29 is like 45 in gay years. Next year I'll be in adult diapers and applying for medicaid.
I asked him if we could switch positions so I could watch the Olympics... I'd say date number two is a miss
He told me I remind him of his ex girlfriend but in a better more advanced way..
Where you at? Come home and endure this shit show called "The Second Presidential Debate".
Randomize
