so my bro's bff came over...we had an awkward "yeah we fucked and can fuck later, but let's just pretend it didn't happen in front of the family" hug.
I wish i could clap on, clap off my penis
I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
you dont publicly announce someones alcholism over facebook. you dont out someone like that.
I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
She interrupted us having sex in the tent by threatening to kill us if we "got cum on the lasanga."
He pointed at some girls and said "I'm gonna have sex with them girls over there", and disappeared.
THERE IS A GOAT THERE IS A GOAT IN MY BED IT IS EATING MY THONG WHAT DID YOU DO
I worked hard to give you that boner. No one else should get to enjoy it!
I threw up in a mitten on my drive home. Wow.
His pick-up lines are quotes from Doctor Who. Of course I fucked him.
Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
I'm bringing my passport in case we get drunk and wind up in Mexico
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
i love you and all, but can that be the last orgy with your wife?
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