How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
Lost is over, my longest committed relationship is coming to an end.
She just did a bodyshot off herself. I don't care that it's only seven thirty, come pick her up.
Did you really just text me at 6:35 in the morning asking where the condoms were? I moved out a year ago.
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
apparently it's a turnoff if you ask a guy why he thinks he needs to use magnums
And then he told me he was too tired for me to suck his dick. Physically and mentally too tired for me to suck his dick. What the fuck?
I told him if he went to see magic mike with me I'd cover his eyes during the penis parts
I'm just gonna yell "SURPRISE ME" and see what happens. No way this could go wrong
Wife and kids came home early...naked passed out covered in chili cheese Fritos dad will haunt them forever.
You're like a human soul vacuum cleaner.
He surprised me with a puppy tail butt plug in his ass and wants me to fuck him
ATTENTION: just found out of have strep. if we have had sex in the past week, might wanna go to the doctor. if you plan to have sex with me in the next 20 days go buy some condoms. stupid antibiotics.
Randomize
