did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
Whatcha textin bout Willis?
I think I should have my paycheck direct deposited to the bar
She is the perfect woman. She cooks, gives good head and doesn't care that I have a small penis.
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
Absolutely. Last time I signed up for a softball league I had sex with my high school economics teacher.
Trick or treaters just rang our doorbell
Give them the moldy beer cans, we need to get rid of those
I want a burrito.
Truly, you are the voice of a generation.
The hot guy sitting next to me in the lib is reading a book called "Impersonal sex in public places." How wrong would it be to give him my number when I bounce?
We got security called on us. Apparently the wedding down the street didn't appreciate the trespassing or our loud as fuck rendition of We Are Young.
I wanted him to come me this time. So I told him last time I was in the city I hit a lady on the head with an inflatable Santa Claus and just found out that the restraining order she requested against me was granted. We never hung out.
Is it acceptable to have my intern get me pedialite and plan b?
It's a learning experience. She can add to her resume that she cured her bosses hangover and poor decisions
Idk what y'all are doing but I just want you to know I'm home and if I hear him say "slap it" one more time I'm moving out
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
Randomize
