I hope you get used to having plenty of sperm because you're never gonna get any.
Still workable. Pretty sure i told her i'd eat her out in the woods.
The best part about the NBA starting up is I get to see Charles Barkley make a fool out of himself for 8 months
I just realized my mom and I make the same noises when we have sex. Fuck.
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
"Don't get as drunk as I was on my birthday" has been upgraded from a goal for Friday night to a goal for my life in general.
I am broke enough to accept it. If I get poisoned, you can have my shoes
i think we watched the dark knight rises after you left but i might have passed out through most of it. I remember crying at the end though. sad tears then happy tears.
I dare you to find another dealer that delivers bud to your home along with deep fried vegan burritos
I forgot what I was gonna say, but I'm pretty excited to not be pregnant.
My one night stand ended up seeing me the next morning... For my interview. Guess who got a job.
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
I think its a little fucked up she invited you to her wedding, are you going?
There is a lot of acid in my drugs right now
....ill put you down as a no then
I would but he’s not speaking to me because I put ketchup in his socks.
Wtf did i hit my head on?
Tequila
Randomize
