I wanna passion pit in your ass
but why does your life always sound like the plot of a porn?
My dad assaulted a TSA agent this morning. Shut down airport security. Don't tell me that your family is embarrassing.
On my arm I have 12 dashes, and below is written "plus 2 pretty stout whiskey drinks, so, you be the judge"
I feel like after that many guys, all of the water in your body is just replaced with pure jizz, honestly.
I'm eating those little wheels of cheese and watching storage wars, this is the opposite of sex.
I just rolled an Obama blunt and a Romney shame joint for tonight. Vote wisely.
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
I have a rash on my arm from the cat litter. Think the cat will be mad that I peed in its box?
I'll give you some choices for what to get me for Christmas. 1.You naked. 2.You naked 3.You naked.
But idk if I cried about life then banged him or banged him and then cried. Chicken or the egg?
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
i woke up this morning with a fake eyeball in my pocket
Whats spookier? Halloween or waking up to a drunk text from your ex telling you how awesome you are at 2am
I mean there are real risks associated with having unprotected sex, but I don’t think I need to worry about a ghost possessing me and having unprotected sex while using my body
Randomize
