My nephew just came out playing with my moms vibrator.
So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
Everyone needs a good pregnancy scare in their life.
How am I suppose to fully love you when you cant even open up and try to fulfill my midget fantasy
Yeah that's one way to look at it on the other hand MY FUCKING BED CAUGHT ON FUCKING FIRE
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
I have bruises everywhere. I think I took "the drinks are strong" as more of a challenge than a warning.
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
Would it be weird to jack off in the hospital?
You know it's time to do the dishes when you take shots of water out of a sake glass...
And you wonder why you're always one of the guys?
Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
So you drank bourbon with cough syrup?
I still had a cough. It only makes sense
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
I've pulled 4 ticks off of me. This is the last time I suck dick in the wild.
And a hot pocket after we fucked. Heaven.
Randomize
