can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
we got back to my place and he started talking about feelings. i politely told him to leave and that he managed to cock block himself.
i just realized i've hooked up with every boy in this taco bell
That's the classiest thing you've ever said.
my facebook is like a giant collection of my one night stands
a kid who worked there came up to me and let me know you were sitting in the bathroom sink. he said it was fine, so i just kept checking on you.
If Megan asks I spilled my water water all over her. I pissed on your roommate. You're welcome. I expect you to keep that on the down low. Seriously tell her the water thing
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
Dude. I might have just seen some porn i wasnt ready to see. The chicks were so old.
so the kid in line in front of me at walmart just bought roses and a Plan B pill. Happy Valentines Day.
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
I literally can not watch Thor without thinking of your dick
Van sex tonight? No need to tell me how classy that sounded.
These random guys found me. They told me not to wander in the woods and i remember saying 'am i fucking Bambi?! I'm not gonna walk into woods!' then i threw up.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
Just sent a nude with the caption "seasons greetings from our family to yours"
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