i'm eating jello out of a teacup with a fork. awesome?
Just saw an Asian guy riding his razor scooter to class. Dreams do come true
you drank 3/4s of your half gallon of vodka, made a fort out of the kitchen table, and actaually had sex in in it.
How was the bike ride?
Nope. High in the basement. Fruit cups.
She's in the middle of blacking out but is singing Mariah carey songs. Hitting every note.
I mean, I'm all about sharing, but when he tells me about his wet dreams about Oprah, I think it's taking it too far.
Are you asking me on a date where we get shithoused and do some fingerpainting?
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
Yeah her jello shots are the next closest thing to a lethal injection. That potent.
We're having Wednesday-night goat-night at the bar.
It's hard to explain...
i don't know why he's complaining, i'm the one with four hickeys on my ass.
Floor bacon is actually really good
I slept on her porch...in her dads handcuffs
Just woke up beside some twink in a kilt.. how is your sunday going
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