Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
Whoa Z and x make the same sound
New Low: Just set a reminder on my phone for me to check on things I need to harvest late on Farmville.
I tried to go shot for shot with some guy called "shit show martinez"
I just saw a girl walk by me wearing a "kiss me I'm pro choice" shirt. Is that a signal for easy access?
My grandpa just complimented my boobs. Im taking this as a compliment but also brushing it off as alcoholism on his part.
I was scoping hash out of our weed jar with a spoon and I realized we need to buy actual utensils. This plastic shit is killing me I've broke 3 spoons
In the memo line of the check she wrote sexual healing.
I have a king size bed, I guarantee multiple orgasms, and I'll give you a ride home in the morning. Respond quickly.
Dude, for twins they have shockingly different blowjob styles.
STOP FUCKING MY SISTERS!!!!
Shower sex is an art that should not be attemted drunk
I've got to stop being so hungover that I puke in the fine establishments of this glorious town.
I just fixed my mom's tv over the phone in 2.17 minutes while high. I'm a fucking professional.
The only thing I remember about us having sex is yelling at him to choke me.
Just saw Little Red Riding Hood riding a guy on hood of a car
Good for her for committing to the costume
Randomize
