eh.. i should've known it was headed downhill after he used the phrase "pussy sundae"
If it wasnt for meatballs I would have fucking killed myself already.
For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
you were so drunk you slurred your pauses
A lady just asked me if you "seat yourselves" here at qdoba. I told her yea and she has been sitting at a table waiting for someone to take her order for 25 mins.
at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
part of it is the fact that im problem drinking, and the other part is my OCD wont let me leave the bottle half-empty.
He got so drunk that he tried hitting on a girl using nothing but his Samuel L. Jackson soundboard application on his Iphone
I just woke up to find the whole kitchen sick had been converted into a gravity bong.
He calls it "his noble steed" and i plan to ride it.
You didn't hold all these dicks to become a party planner!
my make-up looks really good tonight. I swear it had nothing to do with me finishing all of your strawberry vodka.
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
She went to her drug test stoned.
And strangely enough, we all know she'll pass it.
I was trying to drink every time they said planned parenthood but my body isn't cut out for this.
Randomize
