Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
A freshman just woke up on our back pourch... He swears there was a party here last night but we didn't have one
my mom noticed the "toothpaste" stain on my tshirt...she repeatedly attempted to get it off by licking her thumb and rubbing it. See Jenn it obviously doesnt taste that bad...
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
Just had a serious bathroom emergency at walmart a and it appears that i ate a taco bell burrito wrapper last night
i'm gonna start fucking more girls with asthma. help feed my ego.
You know Im horny if Im walking around in my lingerie and sex robe. It's my field of dreams mentality. If I wear it, he will come.
I'm looking for mother nature. And when I find her, I'm looking her right in the eyes and telling her to fuck off.
I'm sorry I didn't respond. I had a shit day. However, I just masturbated to Adele's Rolling In the Deep while crying. It was oddly therapeutic.
Just when I decided to go get a taco and a blunt cake it starts raining. Coincidence? or divine intervention?
As I took my shirt off he commented on how great my boobs where. I responded with "thanks, I grew them myself"
I PUT IT IN THE UNIVERSE THAT I WANTED TO STAB HIM AND THEN SOMEONE DID! KARMA IS A BITCH AND SHE IS BEAUTIFUL!
I was totally going to fuck him and then his friend walked in brushing his teeth, whipped down his pants and started doing the windmill. Ultimate cock block
holy f. i broke my toe giving him head. how does that even happen!?
The air taste purple.
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