have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
I woke up naked in my living room and my mom was next to me like we need to talk
Why the hell does jager make you get to the point of having to army crawl around cause you cant feel your legs and scream jaga bombs when puking??
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
It really ruins the moment when you have to ask to resend the nude pics.
Oh if I trust ANYTHING about you it's your ability to lead a douchebag around by the dick
I kind of feel like BP. I'm dressed in green and absolutely horrible for the environment.
The ratio of last drink to last smoke is so tricky. This could go on until the booze is gone
I walk in and my roomie is fucking her bf while wearing lingerie and minnie mouse ears. Right in the childhood.
That would be a mascot riding an ATV at a semi-professional hockey game, if that doesn't sum up how I've been I don't know what could
I hope you have irresponsible drunk insurance because you're about to pay a deductible
But did u die
I found an onion in my purse
I don't get promposals. When I asked my date I was so drunk I couldn't lift my head. Then I puked on my lawn after he said "ok whatever". That's romance
He couldn't undo my bra. He ended up breaking the clasp he clawed at it so long. We met on Tinder for God sake
You handed me your heels and said, "barefoot running is all the rage." Then you proceeded to run home.
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