fyi, i just bought my first strap-on. the little mermaid theme song was playing in the background.
i mean, we fucked on the futon in the garage where his band practices. pretty sure im now obligated to like his band on facebook.
Yeah but the gay hasidics turned out to actually just be real gay hasidics
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
These pubs in Ireland act like hand jobs aren't the universal currency
She just sent me videos of her blowing my little bro and my best friend... worst. ex. ever.
The bar owner gave me permission to push people into the pool. I'm never going to leave Los Angeles
There is someone hissing in the hallway. Not even a typo. Not pissing. Hissing. Like a large cat. Or a komodo dragon.
Go for gold. Two birds with one vag.
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
Oddly enough, the sex change dream i had made me miss you more.
I think this bruise on my arm is actually an impression of your face
You guys had reggaeton music playing while dry humping? Definition of romance.
I was gonna make a strong case for you to be my midnight kiss, but poptarts sound good too
Dude how much would someone have to pay you to get you to slide your vagina across a bald man's head because Honestly I'd do it for the experience alone. but money would be nice too\n\nI'm thinkin like 500 bucks. Maybe 700
Why are you like this.
Randomize
