She is in my trunk
i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car.
she hot?
i don't wanna talk about it
My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
Vodka infused whipped cream. Shit just got real.
My goal for tonight: make tomorrow as awkward as humanly possible.
Should I be alarmed that you're a regular enough at a bar to show up in sweatpants?
He's basically like a fancy dildo that buys me dinner.
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
took adderall before wrapping presents, ended up making paper snowflakes for two hours
She was humming during sex. After I asked her why, she said it was her sex theme music
I told her that I was going up to my room to lay in front of a fan without pants on, watching Avengers and she still wanted to get with me. I have to marry her.
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
I'm 99.9% sure the people upstairs are using walki-talkies to talk to each other across the room. Too high for this shit
You know the party's good when you say "Never have I ever caused an emergency landing" and someone drinks
She tied me to the bed and did lines off my chest before sex. I’m going to put that on my bucket list just so I can cross it off
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