dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
apparentely "Beer Pong Champ" is not a profession, no wonder they havent called me back......
told ya
According to my dad, my tongue ring makes people assume I give a lot of blow jobs because, as stated by him "that's what it's for"
i just ate that cheese stick that was in my purse from last night.
Pretty much knew it was gonna be awful when the extra condoms she had from her ex were entirely too big for my dick
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
That's why you NEVER put anything a stripper gave you in your mouth
Her boyfriend was wrestling another girl. But, she said she was okay with it because she kept checking for boners--w the back of her hand like she was checking for a fever
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
My mom is wine drunk and on painkillers. As invigorating as that conversation was, it was also a dark glimpse into my future
So last night I turned down multiple drinks because "I didn't want to hold them". It's time reevaluate my decisions
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
Atleast we had sex on the couch before your ex took it from you
He was literally screaming at me for using the same knife to scoop the peanut butter and the jelly.
Watching South Park, doing sit-ups and drinking tequila. In other words, my night is going pretty good.
Randomize
